You're missin something special Tom! Its the 300th episode. Besides it being the hometown visits, the contestants will sing two songs; one of their choice and one of the judges choice. There will be six performances and most likely a commercial. I will number everything for you. Danny's up first.
1. Paula chooses "Dance little sister" I, personally have never heard of it.
The judges responses:
Randy - "Dope"
Kara - "We saw your "money spot" but no gyrating please." Money spot Kara? For some reason that coupled with the word gyrate simply makes me uncomfortable.
Paula -" Im a choreographer and you did fantastic." We have come to expect nothing less from Paula. Although, I am still having nightmares from her performance last week.
Simon - Agrees with Kara - The dancing was desperate but vocally very good and lets loose the toy saxophone next time."
Danny retorts, "Whatevs I wanna SANG that SONG!"
Simon punches Paula in the left breast and we go to the first commercial break.
2. Kara and Randy pick "Apologize" by One Republic for Kris. I noticed at this point that he has neon blue nail polish painted on half of one of his thumbs. He starts at the piano and I am instantly turned on. They zoom in on his hands playing the piano and the polish is gone. The applause is more distinct than Danny's was.
Randy - "This is your genre. It shows us who you can be in the future."
Kara - "Confident. You need to swing it out of the park at this stage of the competition. You should have made it more your own."
Paula - "Right range for you. One bum note but Im proud of you anyway."
Simon - "You just contradicted yourself Paula. Kara, you chose that song and then blamed the horrendous arrangement on him. You contradict yourself as well"...i.e. You're all idiots.
I think another boob punch may be on the way. Kara has her hands suffocating Simon's mouth. Someone may die tonight.
3. Here's my boy...Adam Lambert. Simon chooses "One" by U2 (one of my personal fave's). He has on the same nail polish as Chris on ALL of his fingers. His influence astounds me. It was Bono's pleasure to have Adam sing the song. Now Bono is practically GOD so I raise the roof to you Adam. The first "one love" sounds like Angels watching over me...great I just shed a tear. "We ARE one!" I feel you babe.
Randy - "You in da zone. Hot since day one. You went to far off the melody." This immediately constitues a boistering BOOOO from Simon.
Kara - "You're a strategist. You changed it all around and made it unbeliveable."
Paula - "Im miserable sitting next to Simon gloating. It was brilliant. I am staring at an Idol ight now."
Simon - "I may be biased but that was a brilliant song choice. You did brilliant. Everything was brilliant. You are brilliant." What's the word of the day? Apparently brilliant.
"Adam...if you rewind the song back at home and listen to the lyrics...they are really beautiful." Yes, yes they are. That song is my hope for the world.
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The fight agaist malaria featuring Carrie Underwoood. The scene is set in Africa and the idols are in the backround singing none other than Toto's "Africa." Idol has raised 250 million (The number could be wrong). Carrie spouts out some statistics on Malaria, bednets, children...America is crying again. Again, we are one. Idol gives back.
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4. Its the last chance for GOGO GOKEY to make an impression before the finale. "You are so beautiful" by Joe Cocker. The pride of Milwakeee.
Randy - "I love you showed you are here because you can really, really, really, really sing.
Kara - "Everything you didnt do in the first performance you just did...nothing else to say."
Paula - "You left us breathless. You did magic to that."
Simon - "Wrong arrangement. Otherwise that was a vocal masterclass."
I can't really give you my opinion on this one as I soberly blacked out during this performance. That should tell you enough.
"I came out here with a fresh mind and a fresh heart and i did what I did!"
5. "Heartless" by Kanye West. I am soooooo nervous. Wait!!!!!!!!!!...he is strummin on that acoustic guitar and I think I actually like it. "In the night, I hear them talk.." In the night I just lost my soul to Kris Allen.
Randy - "Toughest voting night in idol history! Better than the original!"
Kara - "Why didnt you do that with Apologize? Acoustic guitar = Fearless. Hot! Hot! Hot!
Paula - "You are the bravest because you sang a song about Simon. I commend you. Bravo!"
Simon - "I thought the song choice was lame and I had written you out of the competition. That, however, has changed after that perfomance."
6. What the hell is Adam Lambert going to pick??? Aerosmith. My heart just skipped a beat. I can already hear Steven Tyler's shrill scream. What Danny should have sounded like last week. "Cryin'" "There was a time when I was so brokenhearted"...not when you sing lover. The backround singer is taking over and i want her to shut the F up. Thanks. aaaaahhhhhhhh...
Randy - "Yo, dude. You one of the best we have ever had. Charismatic...please rock me you rock star!"
Kara - "How do you hit those notes and still talk the next day? We'll see you at the finals."
Paula - "Steven Tyler would have nothing to mentor you for. Your frequent flyer miles will be taking you anywhere you want to go." WTF???
Simon - "Im not going to suck up. Its easy to assume that you will sail through to the finals. So America do not assume and Vote for Adam."
It's up to you America...to choose the next idol.
Here are the numbers once again
For Danny:
1 866 idols 01
1 866 idols 04
1 866 idols 07
For Kris:
1 866 idols 02
1 866 idols 05
1 866 idols 08
For Adam:
1 866 idols 03
1 866 idols 06
1 866 idols 09
So clearly I will have my usual bout of insomnia this evening pondering who is going to win. If you need a recap tomorrow just let me know bro.
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